‘Anything that lights your world, leaves it dark once it’s gone.’ Ashly Lorenzana

So I’m trying something new

It’s a gratitude journal

It seems idiot proof

Every day write down anything you are grateful for


Except it got me thinking

Thank you anxiety

What the fuck do I have to be grateful for?

All the shitty things rushed in first

Pushing away thoughts of anything else

But after a few minutes I started thinking in simplistic terms

Sure some people might think I’m being melodramatic of course others have it worse

That’s relative though

An individual’s pain or happiness is unique to them

It doesn’t have to be a competition

Or a race to the finish

It doesn’t have to be grand gestures or anything tangible

It can be as minimalistic as being grateful that I have my two dogs to keep me company

Or maybe it’s that a friend sent me a message via social media

Of course I wish I could be like one of ‘those people’ who don’t need reminders like this

But c’est la vie, right?

Maybe I’ll always be the person who thinks of all the negative things life throws at her, before she can see anything good

Maybe I’ll always be the person who needs to write out the things they have to be grateful for, before she even realizes they exist at all

And maybe that’s the point of it all

It’s because of those reasons that I can not only find things to be grateful for

But I can see them for the gift they are

Take vision for example

How often people take it for granted

Reading and watching your favourite show and seeing the sun set or rise

Like we have all the time in the world

Not realizing the beautiful luxury that it is

Never knowing how lucky we are, to bare witness to something that others can only dream of

Only understanding how valuable until it’s all been taken away

With only memories to write down in a gratitude journal

Maybe I’m the person who only gets it after it’s gone

8 thoughts on “‘Anything that lights your world, leaves it dark once it’s gone.’ Ashly Lorenzana”

  1. I know it can be hard to think of things you are grateful for when you have to struggle with so many other things. I think this will be a good thing for you to do, actually I think it is a good thing for all of us to do! I do agree with you many things were are grateful for in life we often take for granted because it has always been there, but what if something happened and took these things away from us? I look forward to seeing how this works for you! I can say that I am grateful for you and all your kindness!!!!


  2. I have times where I struggle to get past two things (grateful for my parents, for a roof over my head) and then the shitty thoughts flood everything. I find you sometimes have to ‘think outside the box’ a bit and consider all the small thing, and that blossoms and leads onto other small things and you eventually notice more, appreciate more. But I do get get the ‘only understanding how valuable until it’s all been taken away’; I still kick myself for how I was before 19, before my health started going downhill and how much I took things for granted because I had periods of depression, self-harm, eating disorders and all sorts before then, and only as my life was turning around and I was finding some kind of happiness was it all gradually taken away and I had to start again. I think a daily gratitude journal is a great idea – keep us posted with how you get on! x

    Liked by 1 person

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