‘What else should I be? All apologies’ Nirvana

I wanted one week

Where I could pretend to be like everyone else

Where I could pretend to be the wife you deserve

Where I could pretend to be the person I always wanted to be

Instead I got a day here or there

I was too greedy when I wanted a week

I should have known better

I should have asked for a moment

Maybe two

But a week of unadulterated happiness

Just wasn’t meant for me

And so you had to suffer too

Because once upon a time you were unlucky enough to fall in love with me

This is what your life will be like

What it has been like

Hospital visits

Stomach aches

Crisis centres

Tears

Panic

And so many sorry’s that just get stuck in my throat

Making me choke

On nothing but apologies and regret

Sorry’s that your ears will never hear

Because to utter them might make you wonder the same thing I always do

‘Why the hell is he still here’?

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8 thoughts on “‘What else should I be? All apologies’ Nirvana”

  1. I think you are much more amazing than you think you are. Now, I do relate to every word and do wish one day I could just be like others, well only the ones that are mean spirited and support Trump because that is never going to be me. Angela, please remind yourself that you are wonderful or I will have to remind you daily!!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. You are welcome sweetie! I am so sorry you are going through so much. I guess it is true what they say, life’s a bitch! Things down south haven’t been all that great and we are still thinking a lot about moving to Canada. I might be wrong, but there seems to be a lot less hate there and maybe it is because Canada is a Trump free zone! Take care of yourself and please never stop believing in you and know I am here for you!!!

        Liked by 1 person

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