One May Have Good Eyes Yet See Nothing

I started to write an update as it’s been two weeks since my last infusion day…

But everything seemed so trivial when I saw it typed in front of me

There’s so much that I want to say and yet it doesn’t feel like it would amount to much

So I’ll make this brief and say the only thing I’ve really been wanting to say:

I’ve been watching TV like all day every day

The bingeing kind of TV watching

The kind I’ve been unable to do in so long

And I was scared to say this aloud or type it out

But fuck it it’s my blog after all

My eyes don’t hurt

I’ll say it again for the people at the back

MY FUCKING EYES DON’T HURT!

I can’t remember a time when they didn’t hurt

It’s been that long

How crazy is it that I can barely remember the before MS version of me

I’m not foolish enough to think this is permanent

But for now I’ll relish in this moment

Temporary and short lived or not

And if it all comes back in the blink of my eye…

Write. Write until it stops hurting.’

-Anais Nin

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